TOW The Roses
(Opening Scene: Chandler's Apartment. Chandler is eating cereal alone. There is a knock on the door. Chandler gets up to answer it.)
CHAN: Hold on. I'm coming.
(Opens door to find Monica.)
CHAN: Hi.
MNCA: Hi.
CHAN: What are you doing here?
MNCA: We need some eggs. Do you have any?
(Sits back down.)
CHAN: No I don't. Why don't you eat breakfast with me? These Wheat Flakes now have marshmallows!
(Monica walks over to counter and looks at the cereal box.)
MNCA: Uh, Chandler? They're not marshmallows. The milk's gone bad!
(Spits cereal from mouth into bowl.)
CHAN: (Picks up milk carton) I knew they already found this girl!
OPENING CREDITS
(SCENE: Monica and Rachel's Apartment. Rachel is holding the T-shirt she wore from yesterday. It is covered with wine. Phoebe is playing cards on the coffee table. Ross is reading the paper. Monica is making breakfast. Chandler walks in.)
CHAN: Hey.
PHOE: Hey, Chandler. (pause) You're not gonna kiss me now are you?
CHAN: (smirking) Ha Ha.
RACH: About my T-Shirt..
CHAN: I'm sorry about that. I was desperate.
ROSS: Well it certainly showed last night.
CHAN: So you kissing Rachel is ok! But when I kiss Monica it's a felony?
ROSS: Yes!
CHAN: Ok, just asking...
MNCA: Why is that, Ross?
ROSS: You're my sister and Chandler is my best friend. I can't imagine you two doing...stuff.
MNCA: Well, you're my brother and Rachel is MY best friend. You two certainly did stuff!
ROSS: DID! Not DO!
RACH: Can we just drop it?
ROSS/CHAN/MNCA: NO!
PHOE: Oh, Oh! I have an idea!
MNCA: What is it, Pheebs?
PHOE: You guys can go to Jerry Springer and get money for your story.
CHAN: No thanks, Phoebe.
PHOE: Oh, ok!
(Ross, Chandler, Monica and Rachel make a 'whatever' face.)
CHAN: Mon, can I speak to you? In private?
(Ross' attention is peaked.)
RACH: Ohhh! In private!
MNCA: Sure. (Leads Chandler to balcony.)
ROSS: Heh. (races behind curtains to hear what's going on.)
(SCENE: Monica and Rachel's Apartment Balcony. Chandler and Monica are there.)
MNCA: (Uncomfortable) Ok, so...
CHAN: So..
MNCA: Last night...
CHAN: Big mistake!
MNCA: It was? It was! Definately!
CHAN: We've been friends for too long! I don't want to be like Ross and Rachel and how they are not getting along and all.
MNCA: (Disappointed. Trying to hide it.) I agree!
CHAN: Ok then!
MNCA: Ok.
CHAN: We should get back inside so Ross doesn't have to hide behind the CURTAINS! (Hits window with his hand. It scares Ross and he falls back onto the floor.)
(SCENE: Monica's Apartment. Ross is on the floor. Monica and Chandler reenter from the balcony.)
RACH: So, have fun making out? I mean making up?
CHAN: Last night was a mistake, ok? Now can we get back to our normal lives?
MNCA: (Disappointed still. Trying to hide it.) Sure.
ROSS: (Gets up off the floor.) I'm game! Hey Chandler! Do you want to come with me to a Paleontology Conference?
CHAN: Or lack there of!
ROSS: Fine! If you don't want to come that's fine by me. (Ross Exits.)
(Joey bursts in wearing a robe.)
JOEY: Hey Monica, do you have a cucumber? I need one right now.
MNCA: I think so. Hold on.
PHOE: Why do you need a cucumber?
JOEY: I don't need it. Heather and Cheryl do!
(Monica closes door abruptly even though she found a cucumber.)
MNCA: No, Joey. I don't have any cucumbers.
JOEY: MAN! Well I suppose I could use this broom.
(Grabs the broom and heads back to Chandler and Joey's Apartment.)
MNCA: Joey, wait!
(Monica chases after him. Moments later she comes back without the broom. She is horrified.)
PHOE: What happened?
MNCA: (Shaken up)Nothing.
RACH: Seriously what happened?
MNCA: (Still shaken Up)Joey...lesbians...broom...couch...
CHAN: WHAT? They're doing it on the couch??
(Exits apartment, comes back after a while.)
CHAN: Wow! I never knew you can do THAT with a broom!
(SCENE: Monica and Rachel's Apartment. Chandler has gone to work, as has Ross. Phoebe, Rachel and Monica are there playing cards.)
MNCA: Phoebe, it's your turn.
PHOE: Um, ok. Hmm.. Oh! Go Fish!
RACH: Uh, Pheebs? We're playing Poker.
PHOE: Uh.. Now you tell me!
MNCA: (Looks at the cards)Right... I fold!
RACH: Me too!
PHOE: Yea! I win!
MNCA: (collects cards) You guys up for another hand?
PHOE: Ok.
RACH: Sure, I'll be back. (heads to the washroom)
PHOE: Ok, Monica? What's the deal with you and Chandler?
MNCA: There's no deal. We're only friends. (Starts dealing cards.)
PHOE: Ok, than why are you dealing us 7 cards? I thought poker only had 5 cards.
MNCA: (Looks down at table and find that each player has 7 cards. She collects them again. Rachel comes back.)
RACH: Pheebs did you ask her?
PHOE: Yup.
MNCA: I'm surprised you didn't ask me, Rach.
RACH: Huh? Oh. Phoebe won the coin toss. So what is the deal with you and Chandler?
MNCA: I don't know. I always thought that there was something about us that made us unique. When he and I kissed yesterday, I was like "Wow! Is this really Chandler?" I thought about him all night yesterday. Then I realized.. I realized...
RACH: What did you realize?
MNCA: I realized that (Mumbles) mf mmg hmm. (Looks away.)
RACH/PHOE: Huh?
MNCA: (Turns back to Rachel and Phoebe) I realized that I love him.
PHOE: Aww. That's so sweet.
MNCA: Then today he told me that the kiss was a mistake. (Starts sobbing)
(Rachel hugs Monica)
RACH: There there. I'm sure he'll come through.
MNCA: You don't understand. You can't possibly understand.
RACH: You're right I can't understand. But crying about it won't help.
MNCA: I know. But it just feels good.
PHOE: Look, why don't you tell him how you feel?
RACH: Phoebe's right. Tell him how you feel.
MNCA: No. I can't do that. I can't ruin our friendship.
PHOE: WHAT? Are you crazy?
(Monica stops sobbing. Looks up at Phoebe.)
PHOE: I mean, since I've know you, you've always complained about all the guys you've dated. You never had a serious relationship or anything. You just told us that you love him. I mean he's smart, he's funny, and he's cute!
RACH: Are we talking about Chandler?
PHOE: (Ignoring Rachel) Both of you know more stuff about each other than married couples do in their lifetime. You two practically live together!
RACH: She's right, Mon. You two have known each other for 8 years. That's like going out on 20 dates without sex!
MNCA: I guess you're right. Thanks.
PHOE: So are we playing Poker or what?
(SCENE: Chandler's Office. Chandler is working on his WENUS. No, not that WENUS... The other one with numbers and stuff... )
(Buzz on intercomm)
CHAN: (Presses button) Yes?
(Secretary Answers. She's a STRY)
SRTY: There's someone here to see you.
CHAN: Show him in.
(Someone walks into his office. Chandler looks up.)
CHAN: Oh my god! Janice?
JNCE: Hello Chandler Bing.
CHAN: What are you doing here?
JNCE: Gary left me... again. The question is what are you doing here? You told me you were going to Yemen!
CHAN: Gary left you?
JNCE: He told me that he found me annoying. Can you imagine that?
CHAN: Come to thin...
JNCE: After he told me I just broke everything that was his! You were saying?
CHAN: Come to..uh...a hug! (Opens arms)
(Janice hugs him.)
JNCE: I knew you'd understand.
(Intercomm buzzes.)
STRY: There's someone else here to see you.
CHAN: (Presses a button) Show him in. (Still hugging Janice.)
(Monica walks in and sees Chandler hugging Janice.)
MNCA: (Shocked) Oh! I'm sorry. I'm going now.
(Monica runs out the office.)
CHAN: Monica wait! It's not what you think! (releases Janice)
JNCE: Are you two seeing each other? It's about time you know?
CHAN: What do you mean?
JNCE: When we dated I was afraid that I would lose you to her.
CHAN: Why did you think that?
JNCE: It was pretty obvious. You loved her then Chandler Bing! And you love her now! I'm sorry I ruined it for you. I should be going.
(Chandler is shocked by what Janice said. Then he sprints out of his office in pursuit of Monica.)
JNCE: Goodbye Chandler Bing!
(SCENE: Street outside Chandler's work. Monica is walking down the sidewalk. Chandler emerges from the front doors of the building. He frantically looks around for Monica. He sees her and chases her.)
CHAN: Monica! (Grabs onto Monica)
(Only to find it isn't Monica. It's a stranger. (STGR))
STGR: Creep!
CHAN: I'm sorry. I thought you were someone else.
(Chandler continues his search only to find it futile. He heads back into the building.)
(SCENE: Central Perk. Monica runs in sobbing. Joey, Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel are there. They see Monica.)
RACH: Oh my god! Did he reject you?
MNCA: No. Even worse.
PHOE: Oh. Oh! You found him sleeping with another man!
RACH: Pheebs, you're not helping.
ROSS: Am I missing something?
MNCA: I went to Chandler's office to tell him that I loved him. But I found him there with... Janice!
ROSS/JOEY: WHAT?
(Same time:)ROSS: You were gonna tell him WHAT? JOEY: JANICE?
PHOE: It's going to be ok.
MNCA: How do you know that?
PHOE: Duh! You two are lobsters.
MNCA/RACH/JOEY: WHAT?
ROSS: I think I know what she's saying.
RACH: Let me get you a coffee.
MNCA: Thanks.
ROSS: Hold on, you were going to tell Chandler that you loved him?
MNCA: (Nodding a yes)
ROSS: Wh..Why?
PHOE: DUH! They're lobsters! I thought you understood.
MNCA: I don't know.
ROSS: Look, maybe you're not really in love with him.
(Chandler walks in. No one sees him. He is holding a bouquet of roses which are meant for Monica.)
MNCA: I guess I was in love of the idea that I loved him. You're right Ross, (doubtfully) I guess I really don't love Chandler.
(Upon hearing this, Chandler puts the bouquet of flowers on the table. Then he exits Central Perk as quiet as he came in. Rachel sees the flowers on a table near the door. She grabs the flowers and gives them to Monica.)
RACH: Here, I found these.
MNCA: Roses! I love roses! (Smells the flowers.) They smell wonderful, too.
CLOSING CREDITS
(SCENE: Chandler emerges from his apartment carrying a bag of garbage. Monica is about to enter her apartment carrying a bouquet of roses.)
CHAN: Hey.
MNCA: Hey.
CHAN: Where is everyone?
MNCA: They went to see a movie.
CHAN: Why aren't you with them?
MNCA: I wasn't in the movie seeing mood.
(Chandler notices the roses Monica is carrying. Reminds him of the roses he had brought for her.)
CHAN: (Points out the roses) Where d'ya get those?
MNCA: Oh these? Rachel found them in Central Perk. Can you believe someone left these there?
CHAN: (Smiling, realizing those roses were meant for Monica from himself.) No I can't.
MNCA: So. What's up with you and Janice?
CHAN: Oh that? She came by to tell me that Gary had left her again.
MNCA: Does that mean you're going out again?
CHAN: Oh no. When I went back to the office, she was gone.
MNCA: Why did you leave your office?
CHAN: Uh..WATER! I left to get some water.
(Ackward silence)
CHAN: Good luck with those flowers.
MNCA: Good luck with the garbage.
(Both head off to their separate ways.)
Back