TOW the thinking 3

This is the 3th part of my series. I donīt know how much parts it will have. So please read it and tell what you think. I hope it is less confusing this time. The characters are not mine.

 

The next day came soon, and again I slept long. I always hated sleeping long, I just had to get up before the sunrise, even in the summer. Everybody was sitting in the kitchen having breakfast.

" Morning." I said and took a cup of coffee. " So since Monica is here, does anyone have plans for tonight?" Sean asked. " Why did I have to be here for that?" " Cause I asked everybody." " Well, I have plans for tonight." They looked at me shocked. " You are going out?" Ross asked in disbelief.

" Yeah! Do you have a problem with that?" " Of course not, we were just surprised." Phoebe said softly. I looked at her, she hated when we fighted so I calmed down. " So with who?" Sean asked with a little sigh. " With a friend." I said. " But all your friends are here." Joey said. " I have other friends too, Joey." " Then why donīt we know them?" Rachel asked. " You donīt have to know everything about me!" I said and ran out. This was all too much for me. I knew they were just worried but sometimes I just couldnīt stand their questions and their sorrows. I walked through the city. It was raining and pretty cold, so werenīt mayn people outside. I loved walking in the rain. Sometimes I wished I had a dog that I can out in the rain without looking stupid. " It is always great to see a woman smile." I heard from behind and turned around. " Oh hey." I said and looked into the smiling face of Chandler. " What are you doing here in the rain?" he asked while we continued our walk. " My friends and I fighted and I needed some space. And you?" " I just like the rain." I looked at him, he was soaking wet. Something about his look let me smile, I didnīt do it on purpose it just came automatically. " Why are you smiling?" " I truly donīt know." We looked at each other. In this moment I totally forgot my rape and that it had been him. All I saw were these eyes. " We still meet later, right?" he suddenly asked. " Of course." I said. " So, I am very curios. Why did you and your friends fight?" " My brother and one of my other friends are just very protective." It was just half a lie and so I didnīt feel bad. " I wish I had a brother, or at least friends." " You donīt have friends?" I asked surprised. " No, not real ones. You know, the one you can count on every time."

" I know what you mean." What he had just said took me into thoughts. I wondered if he lost his friends when they found out about the rape. " I have to go now, my mother is probably waiting." He said. I just nodded. " We are gonna see each other later. So Bye, Monica." He ran away like a school boy. When I watched him running, I repeated his words in my head. He had said īMonicaīwith so much feeling, and it was just a name. Happy again, I walked home...

Rachel and Phoebe helped me with the clothes. I was very thankful that they didnīt ask with who I wanted to meet. And I wanted to tell them, but how would your best friends react if you told them that you meet with a rapist? So I kept quiet. Finally I could leave. I was so nervous when I arrived at the restaurant. Chandler wasn`t there yet, but Nora talked with me. I liked her, and Chandler, too. I just didnīt want to admit it to me, at least it is not usual to like the man who raped you. He came a little late but he had a very good excuse for it. " Iīm so so sorry, but there was this little girl and she was in pain, I couldnīt just..." " Itīs ok, Chandler." I suddenly felt bad, I had said his name, his name. It was weird saying it though it was just a name. But when he smiled I forgot everything around me. We decided not to eat `cause we were both not hungry. It was dark and late and we just walked around the city. Strange to say, I wasnīt scared to be alone with him, not even in the night. After some time we were both tired of walking and so we sat down on a bench. You told me everything about his work, his life with his mother and the restaurant. " Whatīs with your father?" I asked cause he hadnīt said anything about him. " He was gay, well now he is dead." " Iīm sorry, that must have been terrible for you." " I didnīt really know him." he said. I decided to change the subject since he seemed to be uncomfortable with it. For a moment we just sat there, enjoying the night. " I once knew a Monica." He suddenly said. I turned to him. I got kinda scared. What if he wanted to rape me again? " Really?" I asked, trying not to sound too nervous. " Yeah, she was on a party with some guys, she had kind of an accident. Anyway, she died, I couldnīt save her." He looked down. I was speechless. " That is terrible." I said but it didnīt sound real. " I guess that is the reason why I became a doctor. It was so terrible, they brought her to the hospital and then after like a year or something they told me that she had died." " What kind of accident did she have?" " She got raped." That was all very confusing for me. Rape, Monica, party but died? Chandler saw that something in me was working. " Are you ok?" he asked. " Yeah, I just want...I wanna go home." I said cause I couldnīt think of anything else to say. " I`ll give you a ride." " No, no, it is ok. Bye Chandler." I ran away as fast as I could. My head was spinning. Everything was weird again, and I knew that meeting with Chandler had been a big mistake....

 

 

It was pretty short, but I couldnīt make it longer. And again it was confusing and boring, I think so anyway.

Written by Anika