The One With The Bathroom

Written by: Sally Zahnle

Yay!! My fifth fanfic!! I'm so happy. Please send feedback to Thanks!

    Scene one-Monica and Rachel's apartment. Monica, Rachel, and Ross are sitting on the couch. Chandler enters from the bathroom. Monica stands up.

CHANDLER: All yours.

MONICA: Finally.

    Monica goes into the bathroom. She comes right out holding a can of air spray and motions to Chandler.

MONICA: Chandler, sweety, whathave I said about the air freshener?

CHANDLER: Other that 'Damn it Chandler, use the air freshener when you do that!'? Nothing.

MONICA: Would you, please?


    Chandler gets up and goes into the bathroom with the can of spray. He comes back without it.

CHANDLER: Your highness. (Bows towards the bathroom)

MONICA: Thanks. (Brushes past him and goes into the bathroom)

    Chandler looks at everyone. They are all looking at him like 'Whats wrong with her? She's worse than usual.'

CHANDLER: (Looks sheepish while he is saying this) I accidently pushed her out of bed this morning.



    Scene two-Central Park. Chandler and Monica are walking around hand-in-hand. They pass a small playground where some children are playing.

CHANDLER: I'm sorry about this morning.

MONICA: I'm sorry I was so bitchy about the air freshener.

CHANDLER: I love you.

MONICA: (Lays her head on Chandler's shoulder) I love you too.

    They walk silently for a little while, until a small child runs across the path in front of them.

MONICA: Do you ever think about having kids.

CHANDLER: All the time. But I don't think we're ready for kids yet. I mean, we just got married and we don't even live in the same apartment.

MONICA: (Looks kind of sad) Oh.

CHANDLER: (Notices the look) You want kids in the condition we're in?

MONICA: No, I'm (Hesitates)


MONICA: Pregnant


MONICA: I took a test this morning in the bathroom.


MONICA: I have an appointment with the doctors tonight. It might just be a false alarm.


MONICA: If I'm pregnant, would you want to keep it?

CHANDLER: (Snapping out of his daze) Of course! That is, if you want to.

MONICA: I don't know...

CHANDLER: (Hugs her) Please keep it Mon. Please.


    Cut to Monica and Rachel's apartment. Everyone is there and Monica is obviously telling them she is pregnant.

ROSS: YOUR WHAT!?!?!? I'm gonna kill you Chandler! (Gets up and starts chasing Chandler around the apartment. Chandler hides from Ross behind Monica)

CHANDLER: Damn it Ross!

MONICA: Ross, leave him alone! We're married!

RACHEL: I think its great. Ross, sit your ass on that couch and leave Chandler alone.

CHANDLER: Thank you, Rachel.

JOEY: My boy's havin' a baby! (Gets up and hugs Chandler)

PHOEBE: That's so cool! Now the triplets will have a little playmate! (Claps her hands with joy)


    Scene three-hospital waiting room. Chandler and Ross are pacing nervously in front of five chairs. Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey are sitting in them.

PHOEBE: Would you sit down! Your making me sick!

CHANDLER: Sorry! But I'm so nervous. I want a baby. What if its just a false alarm?

RACHEL: Did you ever think about TRYING for a baby?

CHANDLER: (Smart ass remark) No, Rachel. I never thought about that.

MONICA: (Runs up and yells) It's not a false alarm!

CHANDLER: (Runs to her, grabs her, and swings her around) Yes! (Puts her down, gives her a kiss, hugs her, and whispers in her ear) I love you.

MONICA: I love you too.

    Everyone but Ross runs to her and gives her a big hug.  Ross sits down in one of the chairs and looks flabbergasted (I felt like putting a big word in the script other that "pregnant") Chandler seperates from the group, goes to him, and sits down.

CHANDLER: Whats wrong man?

ROSS: (In awe) My sister's having a baby. My BEST FRIEND'S baby.


ROSS: Sorry, but I just a little flabbergasted (Had to do it again. I love that word!!).

CHANDLER: Whoa hoa! Flabber-whozit?

ROSS: Suprised.

CHANDLER: Oh. (Relizing) OH. Aren't you happy?

ROSS: Of course! I'm just finally getting a niece or nephew that I have always wanted.

MONICA: (Comes over) Hey. Chandler, could I talk to Ross for a minute?

CHANDLER: Sure, hon. (Kisses her on the forehead, joins Rach, Joey, and Pheebs, and does his little victory dance)

MONICA: Are you okay with this?

ROSS: Of course! Are you crazy? I love this! I'm just gonna have to get used to it for a while. Thats all.

MONICA: You are the best big brother. (Gives him the big hug he deserves)

ROSS: Why is that?

MONICA: You introduced me to the man I love.


    No end teaser. Just scenes for next week’s episode.