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face it, it has to end sometime....i wanted the ending to be happy, but how without being soppy?? why not funny instead..or shocking !!
ok....so Chandler + Monica are in a serious relationship. Phoebe and Joey hare not in any relationship... Ross + Rachel did get divorced, but now are dating again (bizarre..but guys..this is FRIENDS, the world of Mr Potato head Husbands, lesbian ex-wives, third nipples, wrong name weddings, and sudden things happening overnight, especially when drunk and/or depressed)
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SCENE: M+ C flat. Phoebe and Rachel and Monica are all around the sofa
Phoe: so there was me, just standing outside the supermarket with a whole group of other animal lovers, trying to stop the people buying meat

Rach: did it work ?

Phoe: no...everyone came out with two turkeys, but that was only cos it was christmas, plus they had a special offer on them.

Mon: oh yeah, I got two as well

Rach: why two ?? we always had one

Mon: yes.....but Joey's going to be eating with us too.

Rach: I'm not really bothered much about christmas, except the sales of course, but the Millenium, that's something BIG !!!

Phoe: Yeah, I mean the last time we had one....well, It was like a thousand years ago, and so many previous lives that I can't remember. I'm still hoping we don't get bitten by that bug

Rach: what >???

Phoe: you know, whytookay...that bug that everyone was worried about....

Rach: nevermind.....

Mon: so ?? does that mean we should do something special ??

Rach: of course, we need to have a party

Mon: but at such short notice ?? no one will be able to come !!!

Rach: oh..well there'll be the six of us as normal, and well, we can invite Carol and Susan

Phoe: will Ross mind ??

Rach: no.....he's kind of got used to it all, I mean it being about 7 years ago !!

Plus their extended friends. Gunther will come to boost the numbers up, and well, perhaps Treager will come too, he doesn't seem to have many friends.

Mon: ok....well this will be fun, I love being the hostess, and we haven't had a party in ages, well, not since last week.

Phoe: what were we celebrating then by the way ??

Mon: I can't remember.....but it was a big laugh

(enter Joey)

ALL: hey

Joey: hi guys.

Rach: hey Joey, what are you doing for the millenium ??

Joey: well, not a lot.....

Phoe: good, come to our party......

Joey: does it involve beer ??

Rach: sure, if thats what you want !!

Joey: Yeah, I mean we have to stock up, if everything crashes, we need to have emergency essentials

Mon: and beer is an essential ??

Joey: it is to me !!!

Rach: don't worry Joey, we'll have plenty of that......

Joey: good, cos that would be a real millenium disaster !!

FADE OUT TO: Ross and Chandler in central Perk

Ross: and then our security systems have all been checked, I mean we don't want any dinosaurs being stolen, imagine the danger

Chan: yeah... Jurassic Park eat your heart out !!

Ross: but I heard Monica is arranging a Millenium party for all of us

Chan: it will be cool, but the problem is, well my boss wants me to be in the office incase of any year 2000 problems with the computer system. I don't know how to tell Monica.

Ross: just tell her, I'm sure she wont mind.

Chan: I guess, but I wanted to celebrate with the gang !!!

(enter Phoebe)

Phoe: hi

Chan: oh hi there Pheebs,

Ross: how's the protesting going ??

Phoe: well, we tried to use reverse psychology to stop the shoppers buying the turkeys, but that had the opposite effect

Ross: what's wrong with people eating turkey Pheebs ??

Phoe: animals Ross, I love animals. Imagine if everyone started eating your dinosaurs, wouldn't you be angry

Chan: hate to break this to you Pheebs, but Ross deals with creatures that died long before your first previous life

Ross: yeah, and you can't eat dinosaur, they'd kill you. Haven't you ever seen the programmes on TV

Phoe: wait a sec ! how on earth can dinosurs be on TV if they can't be eaten

Chan: Lord, give me strength !!!

FADE OUT TO: C+M appartement. Chandler and Monica are sitting on the couch

Mon: I'm really looking forward to this party, Joey is arranging the beer, Phoebe is arranging the decorations and I'm arranging the food. It's going to be soo perfect

Chan: yeah, it is, but listen,. I have a problem.

Mon: honey, you have lots of them, but lets think about the party right now

Chan: nooo, i mean my boss wants me to be at my office on millenium eve, i haven't a choice. I don't think I have to do much, but he wants me there, in case of an emergency, there ready to see in the new millenium

Mon: but..why ?? you have to be with us

Chan: you know I wanna be with you and the guys, but this is my job,I don;t really wanna start off the new millenium on the dole !!!

Mon: oh...well..I guess if you have to. But you know, are you allowed any visitors in your office ??

Chan: who ??

Mon: well me, and some wine and candles ??

Chan: if we keep it secret...but what about the party ??

Mon: well, I can sneak off...it will be fun !!!

Chan: sounds great.......i knew having an office to myself finally would pay off !!!

(enter Joey)

Joey: WEE HEE !!!

Chan: someone is happy

Joey: you betcha, I just won a weeks supply of beer !!!

Mon: how ?? (disbelieving)

Joey: well, I bought a can today, and pulled the ring pull, and it said so \!!!! they're gonna deliver the lot in time for the millennium, we will have such a great party !!!!!

Chan: yeah.......lots of beer...... !!

Joey: well, I was thinking of the entertainement, and we have to have a game of strip poker !!!

Mon: Ross might want to play scrabble

Chan: Rach likes monopoly, but that's only cos you can buy stuff. I always win that, i always buy Mayfair and Park Lane

Joey: yeah, well strip poker will be far more fun..

(enter Rachel)

Rachel, you're up for strip poker aren't you ??

Rachel: I dunno, but you know Joey, we'll all gang up on you again !!

Joey:ok....let's play monopoly instead.

Rachel: so, Mon, how are the arrangements going ??

Monica: fine...we'll have such a great party. Joey's won a week's supply of beer !!!

Chandler: but it will probably only last a day or two,

Joey: talking about beer, I'm thirsty, let's go grab a coffee.

SCENE: Ross and Phoebe in Central Perk

Phoe: so Bill is gonna come to our party.

Ross: he;s not one of your wierd friends is her ??

Phoe: oh no, Bill is perfectly normal, he just talks when he eats and lives with his mother.

Ross: how old is he ??

Phoe: thirty two. why ??

Ross: he still lives with his parents ??

Phoe: so.....I used to live with my grandmother

Ross: ok.....anyway...when are you going back out protesting ??

Phoe: fairly soon..I'll see if Joey wan't to come out too

Ross: er....Pheebs, Joey is the biggest carnivore there every was.

Phoe: so ??

Ross: it's kinda hypocritical, but nevermind

PHOE: I kinda need all the help I can get..

FADE OUT to Joey and Rachel,Phoebe out on a New York street outside a chain supermarket. there is a whole crowd of hippy sort of people, holding banners saying "Turkeys should have a happy christmas too"

Joey: what are we doing here ?

Rach: the question is, what am I doing here ??

Phoe: trying to save the world, and save innocent animals being eaten for no reason

Joey: it's the festive season Pheebs,people like to eat turkey..

Phoe: they can eat something else instead, like, vegetables, or or fruit

Rach: I don't think they go well with cranberry sauce !! Anyway, I'm gonna go now, Pheebs, I'm not a vegetarian, and I feel like I need to have a PHD in flowerpower to hanger around out here. Plus I wanna buy some of those turkeys myself

Phoe: don't leave me, we have to stand up against these turkey murderers...

Rach: they're on special offer.....

Joey: don't worry, I'll stay here..I just need to get something to eat..will be back soon.

FADE OUT TO: Central Perk. Chandler and Ross are there

Chandler: so how are things going with you and rachel now ?

Ross: great, it's great being in a rleationship again.

Chandler: It was wierd how you guys dated, broke up, got married, divorced and now dating again

Ross: yeah..tell me about it

Chandler: Jerry Springer would have a field day with you two !!

Ross: yeah..well....last christmas was a bit of a bummer, and this one will be great with rachel, plus the millenium is coming too. the party's gonna be fun..shame you wont be there.

Chandler: i Know..but if Doug wants me to sort out the WENUS and ANUS as well as the millennium bug, what am I supposed to do ??

Ross: good point, well, I'm sure some of Joey's beer will be left over for you.

Chandler: forget about beer, we don't get the chance to celebrate the millenium much, we'll have some champagne !!

FADE OUT to: the street outside the supermarket..Phoebe is protesting as Joey approaches her with a hot dog. She looks at him in horror

PHOE: Joey..why are you eating that ??

JOEY: I'm hungry.

PHOE: but..this is a protest all about vegitarianism. You can't protest and eat meat.

JOEY: why not ??....oh..i gettit

(some other people notice Joey and start approaching him angrily.....

FADE OUT to: Chandler and Monica's flat. It is the eve of the millennium, everyone is there except Chandler. Monica is looking depressed, Joey is sitting in a sea of beer cans, Ross and Rachel are chatting and sipping champagne. Gunther, Bill and Phoebe are all dancing to some party tunes, as well as a crowd of people we might know, or don't.

(loud burp from Joey's direction)

MON: Joey !!!

JOEY: sorry...Mon...just the best party I've ever had...

MON: nah....it's boring

JOEY: No it isn't..enough beer to last me an eternity

MON: or until next week. I just wish Chandler was here

JOEY: Chandler's not here ???

MON: duh....where were you the last week or two ??

JOEY: i dunno.....mostly in Louise's bedroom

MON: who's Louise ??

JOEY: this girl I'm seeing.

MON: oh....cool....good for you Joey.

JOEY: well, you should cheer up a bit Mon...everyone else is enjoying themselves

MON: erm/...yeah I might go and visit Chandler in his office .

JOEY: you can do that ??

MON: sure.....he has a huge office.....and there's candles and stuff there. Everyone else seems toi be having a great time....

JOEY: you go then...

MON: but Joey..don;t get too drunk..ok..and if you are sick tommorrow..make sure you get to the bathroom on time..

JOEY: ok....happy new year in advance

MON: bye

(Ross and Rachel don't notice anything and continue to chat in the background sipping champagne. No one else sees Monica dissapear off)

ROSS: I bet this time next year you and I will be together still

RACH: I dunno, depends if we can beat I record...

ROSS: no..i think this year is going to be perfect, you, me and a lot of love !!!

RACH: arhh...soo sweet.....

ROSS: thanks !!

RACH: no...the champagne...Chandler's bought very sweet stuff.

ROSS: it was on special offer, like the turkeys

RACH: I think I have seen enough turkey to last me the whole of the year

ROSS: well, that will only be for a couple more hours !!!

RACH: Yeah....lets get some more to drink !!!

(get up, and the cameras goes to Phoebe, Bill and some others giggling)

PHOE: and then his mum said I could stay over night in his room !!!

BILL: she's not too strict about these things, she even let me come out tonight

GUNTH: and you're 32 ??

BILL: so..age is relative..she was worried about the millenium disasters and stuff

GUNTH: what ??

BILL: she believe's it's all gonna end

PHOE: nah.....i don't want this life to end so soon...

GUNTH: I think I need to get some more alcohol.

PHOE: Joey's the man with the cans....

FADE OUT TO: Chandler's office. Monica enters and sees Chandler sitting bored out of his mind in front of a screen behind a desk.

CHAN: hey there...nice to see ya

MON: you too, the party was kinda boring..plus I wanted to see the millenium with you. Where did you put the candles and wine ??

CHAN: er...Doug needed them....there in his office...I think his wife paid him a visit and hasn't come out yet.

MON: oh....that was our wine !!!

CHAN: nevermind ...we're alone, and we've got each other.....

MON: Lets see in the millennium together..

(time lapse...)

Chandler and Monica are watching TV in Chandler's office..seeing the seconds go by)

C+M: 5,

(BACK at the flat)

EVERYONE: 4, 3,

(Back at Bing's office)

C+M: 2, 1.........HAPPY NEW YEAR !!

(back at the flat)

EVERYONE: HAPPY NEW YEAR !!!!

(Monica goes over to Chandler to give him a New Years kiss, but it goes on......and as things heat up,

we fade to C+Ms flat after a time lapse............ Ross and Rachel and Gunther aren't there. Phoebe and Bill are nibbling crisps

BILL: (MUFFLED..HE'S Talking and eating at the same time) this year is gonna be great (spits out a crisp by mistake) I mean.....we can do so much together

PHOE: Bill, can you not talk when you eat ??

BILL: oh sorry honey..I'm just so hungry..... (walks towards fridge and finds left over turkey scraps, and starts eating them)

PHOE: you said oyu were a vegitarian....

BILL: I know....but i like meat too much.

PHOE: you lied to me !!!

BILL: I can't help it, my wife likes it..she cooks it for me

PHOE: your wife ?? your married ???

BILL: no..no..no...

PHOE: your married ?? I though you said she was your mother

BILL: er.....well..not exactly..she just doesn;t use moisteuriser

PHOE: well, I can't see you anymore.....you lied twice.... and you talk when you eat..I think you should leave......

BIL: er..ok...thanks for the free food and beer..and er...happy new year

PHOE: (angrily) and to you too!!

(Bill leaves and Phoebe goes and sits down next to Joey, who opens his eyes to see Phoebe. She grabs a can of beer, and starts to drink it quickly)

PHOE: this new year is so gonna suck

JOEY: (very drunk) what happened to the chick and the duck ??

FADE OUT to Joey's flat. Ross is sitting there looking confused....there are a lot of beer cans and wine glasses everywhere here too...but the room is empty apart from Ross sitting up in a comfy chair....looking around. Susan enters (Carol's lesbian lover)

SUS: hi Ross, where's everyone ??

ROSS: Dunno..I was just with Rachel a little while ago..then she went off to the bathroom. I went to check on Joey and when I came back no one was here.

SUS: oh....well..you shouldn;t worry..she should be back soon...

woo...I think some of Joey's beer was awfully strong

ROSS: tell me about it, I only had a few glasses or so...... (clearly a bit drunk). Anyyyyyway..where's Carol ??

SUS: she had to leave early to relieve Ben's babysitter.

ROSS: oh..why did you stay ??

SUS: am I not welcome here ??

ROSS: sure you are...I've forgiven all that's in the past...things have worked out fine you know. In fact if it wern't for you...I may not be with Rachel right now

SUS: really ??

ROSS: yeah..things worked out for the best,...me and rachel are just like you and carol....er..except we do "things" differently..

SUS: course you do...I used to too, til I realised I was different. I wonder what it's like to be a hetero sometimes...............

ROSS: you do ??

SUS: sometimes I wish I was.......

FADE TO C+M's flat.

The Next morning....or lets just say it's very late morning./....more like early afternoon..perhaps. Enter Chandler and Monica hugging each other. The place is an absoloute pig stye....clothes and beer cans and crisps and mess everywhere

MON: hallo ??

CHAN: anyone awake yet ??

MON: that's great..everyone went home and left this place in a complete mess..this looks like my worst nightmare.... (she reaches under sink for cleaning impliments..meanwhile Chandler wanders into his and Monica's bedroom......)

CHANDLER: (wthin) OH.....MI..........GAUD !!!!!

(time lapse)

CHAN: you slept together ??

JOEY: we were drunk......friends who were drunk

CHAN: but.....i can't believe this,....

PHOE: isn't this how you and Monica started ??

CHAN: yeah..

MON: but was it just a drunk stand or are you gonna become a couple

CHAN: and what about Bill Pheebs ??

PHOE: He's married...

MON: oh..gosh...I'm sorry Pheebs

PHOE: its ok...he lied a lot....

JOEY: I don't think we can cross the line...

PHOE: maybe we should just stay friends till we know what we really want.

JOEY: actually .....I need to... (runs towards the bathroom...about to well...be sick ..)

FADE OUT: time lapse....chandler, Monica and a sleepy Phoebe trundle into Joey's pad, which is a bit tidier. Ross sees them come in...and walks out of his room sheepishly, closing the door behind him.

MON: Happy new year Ross

ROSS:yeah..and you too.

PHOE: (half a wake) How's Rachel ??

ROSS: er....(looks around) dunno.....

CHAN: still asleep I bet....

ROSS: err...yeah...major hangover...

CHAN: yeah....Joey wishes now he didn't win all that beer !!

ROSS: me too !!!(looks nervously at the cloed door behind him)

MON: you stayed here overnight ??

ROSS: er..yeah...Joey wasn't here..and I was a bit drunk

PHOE: I know the feeling !!!

MON: I'd better get back to tidying taht place up...it was a complete mess !!!!

ROSS: (nervously) Yeah you'd better be going.....

CHAN: ok...well..say hi to Rachel for us...and happy new year.....

(Phoebe, Chandler and Monica all leave..Ross is now in the room alone)

ROSS:(to himself) but where is Rachel, and what on earth do I tell her ??

FADE OUT TO: Central Perk (it's empty.....not being open in New Years Day....Rachel's head pops up from behind the counter)

RACH (voice-over) oh ...god...what the hell am I doing here ?? .................what the hell happened last night...................................I know I drank too much...but where the hell is Ross..............it's a new year.....but i don't remember what happened...... (gets up..and stumbles over to couch (she's wearing a black dress) .................wait.....I was with Ross.....then I went to get a coffee....with.................

(enter Gunther with a tray of Orange juice and Toast)

GUN: hey Rachel.......you're awake..............I've got some breakfast here for you. (puts tray on table).

(Rachel looks astonished, very hungover still...she has no idea what might have happened)

RACH: (voice-over) I didn't...........with Gunther ??............did I ???
 
 
 

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TOW the end part two coming soon............
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