My first language is French, so don't expect a perfect English...
In this one R&R are together, C&M are not...yet...;-) we don't know exactly in witch season it happen, so you'll have to decide, if you need to know...

[Scene: Central Perk, everybody but Joey and Phoebe are here]
J: (entering deadpan)(in a Ross way) Hi, guess the news.
C: Your wife's a lesbian?
(Monica laughs, Ross just glares at him, and Rachel after a while fakes laugh, obviously she didn't understand)
J: My Grand-ma just died.
All: Oh, no!...etc...
C: Sorry dud
J: Yeah! and I don't have any money left!
M: Pardon?
C: Yes, you'll have to explain your point here, 'cause I'm not sure to understand...you need money?
J: Yes, you know she was Italian, and some of her daughters are still there, so they decided to give her back to her natal land, I didn't really understand...anyway, I've to go to Napoli, and I don't have the money, and I don't even speak Italian, so It'll be booooring...but I've to go...(he looks at the others waiting for an answer, you know how Joey would do that...)
C: (standing up) I never went to Italy...ok, if we can come with you, I'll give you the money.
J: (hugging Chandler very hard) Thanks, thanks, I luuuvvvv you
C: Arrgg!! stay away!!! help help!!
J: (letting him go) right, sorry...(very manly) thanks dud!
C: (trying to recover his breath) anytime
M&R&Ro: Were going to Italy!!! (they high five)
P: (who just entered) We are!!??! Oh, I'm so happy!!!
Ro: It's 'cause Joey's Grand-ma just died Phoebs.
P: (hugging Joey) oh I'm sorry...I'm not that happy you know.
M: Ok hurry up, hurry up!!! go pack!!!
J: Err Monica...we are not leaving until tomorrow...
M: Less than 24 hours!! hurry up!!!
(The other sight and we fade out)

[Scene: in front of the airport, they are getting of a Taxi, Chandler give the taxi driver some money]
M: OK, every body has his plan ticket?
All: Yes mom
M: Passport?
All but Joey: Yes mom
M: (panicking) Joey!?!
J: (he looks into his bag) err...you'll laugh...
M: WHAT!!??!!!
J: Hey! calm down, just kidding!
M: Joey you sooo...
(Joey hides behind Chandler)
M: Anyway, so everything's ok...oh, no!!! I didn't booked the rooms!
Ro: It's ok, I did it like you asked me to, remember?
M: oh, right. do we have each a room?
Ro: they were chip, so yes
M: ok, ok, what did we forget? I'm sure I forget something!!!
C: Here. (He gives here a little pill)
M: What's that?
C: Just a little tranquillizing...
(Monica makes him a face and they enter the airport as Chandler runs ahead, pretending to be scared)

[Scene: a hotel's lobby,Ross is giving the rooms's keys]
Ro: So, the 05 is the big bed's one...hehe...mine and Rachel's...err Joey, tell me a number.
J: 1151 (proud of himself)
Ro: Joey, huh, it was to choose your room, you know, I give you the number witch is the nearer of yours...so...wanna try again?
J: 1152?
Ro: Forget it, here you have, the 39
J: (to Rachel) but I said 1152!
(Rachel tapes his shoulder compassionate)
Ro: So there is the 15 & the 16 left!
M: The 16's for me!!!
Ro: yes I know, your fetish number...
M: Yes! Gotcha!
C: Your life's sooo exciting...
(She makes him a face)
Ro: and so Chandler you'll have the 15
C: Noooooo? How come?
Ro: Just shut up
M: (happily) Lets go unpack!
R: (whispers to Ross) huh, do we have to unpack right now...(she smile at him suggestively)
Ro: (whispering back) What do you think?...
R: (to the others happily) Ok, don't wait for us tonight!
(They leave in a hurry)
C: What do you guy think about a pizza and pasta evening?
M&P: Yes! Go for it!
J: Sorry but I'll have to pass
C: What!? Who are you and were is our Joey!!??!!
J: Sorry Chandler but I promised I would come to the deathwatch...
All: Oh...
J: ...and I was kinda hoping that one of you would come with me...
(Their is a big silence)
P: Oh, me I'll come with you! But you'll own me something!
J: Err...like what?
P: I dunno yet, but I'll tell you.
J: ok
M: do you two have to leave now?
J: I'll to be there in 1 hour...so...yeah, I guess.
M: Ok, so that left me and Chandler, we can go unpack!!!
C: Noo! Noooo! Joey, don't leave me alone! Help Joe! Help!!
M: Just come, Bing!
(She picks him up by the ear and drives him toward the lift)

[Scene: Monica's hotel room, she has just finished to unpack]
C: Are you finally ready?
M: Yes, were do we go?
C: Their isn't any McDonald here, So we'll have to go in an Italian restaurant...
M: Very funny, let's go
C: K.
(They leave)

[Scene: The deathwatch, Phoebe is talking in Italian with a big Mama]
P: (to joey) She's very funny!
J: (visibly boring) yeah...
(Phoebe continues to talk with the woman and Joey sights)

[Scene: a door with the number 5 on it, R&R room of course]
(We hear some laugh...)

[Scene: the hotel's lobby, Chandler&Monica come back from the restaurant]
M: Can you believe the Chef agreed to give me some recipes?That's so nice of him!
C: He had to chose between that or death! You looked as you would have killed him!
M: What?!? That's not true! I was very nice! maybe a little bit excited and there was wine... but I didn't looked angry or anything!
C: Wow, I wouldn't like to be here when you'll be angry...
(She makes him a face and Chandler pretend to be scared)
(Cut to the front of Monica's room)
C: ...and never forget the chef secret tip, spit in all your pizzas!
M: Bing, how come you're so stupid?
C: Gueller, it's a natural gift!
(They walk in Monica's room)
(Cut to the room)
M: Wanna watch TV?
C: sure

(Cut to later, They are watching TV, lying on monica's bed)
M: This movie suck! Could you PLEASE switch the channel?
C: Err......no.
(he gives her a hug smile)
M: Chandler!
C: I've got the remote, I'm the T.V. king! I choose the channel!
M: (trying to take the remote) Gimme that!
C: No way!
(No one move during a while, and suddenly Monica quickly kisses him on the lips and while he's stunned, quickly stoles the remote and gets up.)
M: Gotcha!
C: hey! Gimme that back!
(He chases her around the room and finally catch her, they fall onto the bed. She tickles him 'til he lets her go and she continues to tickle him. She ends up sited on his stomach, her hands holding his shoulders. She takes the remote and switches the channel)
M: I won
C: really?
(He looks deeply in her eyes, she gets confused, and he kisses her passionately. He takes advantage that she's stunned to extricate himself and to reverse the situation)
C: Gotcha!
M: You're a demon!
C: (He whispers in her ear) Yesss!
(They heads are very close, they stop moving, looking in each other eyes. She kisses him lightly, he kisses her back. The kisses became more and more passionate)
M:(still kissing, out of breath) What's that?
C:(between two kiss, out of breath too) dunno...
(They continu to kiss more and more hard and passionately and we fade out because the following part would take place in a XXXstory wich you'll have to write by yourself ...LOL anyway...lets read!)

[Scene: Ross&Rachel's room, R&R are sleeping]
(Rachel slowly wakes up, she open a little bit her eyes. Her eyes suddenly wide open)
R: Ross! Gets up, gets up! It's 10 AM! We'll be late for the funeral!
Ro: hu....What?
R: We're late!
Ro: Oh merda!
R: Is that the only Italian word you remember?
Ro:...yes
(They quickly gets up)

[Scene: Monica's room. Her and Chandler are getting dressed in a hurry.Their is the bed between them]
C: How could that have happened?
M: That was an, an accident, yes an accident!
C: (He stops) Aren't accident supposed to be bad?
M: Chan...
C: An accident! that was an accident!
(They are now dressed)
(He sees that she looks worried, so come to her, takes her shoulders and looks in her eyes)
C: Don't worry, accidents have no need to be knew, ok?
M: (breaths deeply) Thanks Chandler...
(He gives her a hug smile)
C: It's ok.
M: Now you should mess up your bed
(He smiles)
M: W...what?
C: Monica's telling me to mess up something!
(She smiles in a way to say"very funny", he smiles back. They're looking in each other eyes and their smiles fade back)
C: (suddenly) I...I have to mess up my bed...(He leaves very quickly)
(Monica doesn't move for a while and finally follows him)

(Cut to Chandler's room, He's lying down on his bed on his stomach, a pillow on his head)
(Monica enter. He hears the door getting closed and quickly gets up)
M:(takes a breath and ask shinny) May I help you to mess up?
(He approaches her, their is a silence tense)
M:(with a strangled voice) That could be another accident...
C: Oh, yes!
(They kiss passionately. He takes her by the waist and moves the kiss on the bed and just when it looks like they are about to do "stuff", we hear some loud thumb on the door)
Ross' Voice: Chandler! Chandler, are you in here?
C: (trying to be better dressed while Monica runs in the bathroom) uh...yes?
Rachel's Voice: What are you doing, we're late! Come on, let us in!
C: (He go to open the door) it's ok
(R&R enter)
Ro: You're not ready?
R: And were's Mon? She's not in her room!
C: She...went to buy aspirin
Ro: Aspirin?
C: Yes, we had a little bit to much alcohol at the dinner, so you know...hangover...headache...
Ro: Ok, you were totally drunk and you slept with yours clothes, right?(he points his clothes witch are messed up)
C: Err...kinda, yes
Ro: Wait, wait I know you when you're drunk! You didn't do anything to my sister don't you?
C: No! no! I would never do anything like that! Even drunk, rules are rules!
Ro: I know you wouldn't! (He taps his shoulder and he mutters)I hope so...
R: And what about the funeral?
C: (uncomfortable) Yes right! Go ahead, we'll joint you as soon as she arrives!
Ro: Ok, don't be too late
R: Bye
C: Bye
(They go out and Monica enters from the bathroom)
M: Fuuuh!...
C: duh...
M: (After a little silent)...you were drunk?
C: (face her) No.
(he stares at her and kisses her deeply)
M: Maybe I didn't found the aspirin and I lose my way...
C: ...and then we didn't found the funeral place
M: We are really stupid duh!
C: yes really stupid!
(They continue to kiss and we fade out)

[Scene: The front of a church, C&M are running. When they are about to enter, the door open and lot of people are going out, wearing black. Rachel Ross Joey and Phoebe are the last]
P: (seeing C&M) Hey We're here!!!
R: Were have you been? You should have come a long time ago!!!
Ro: Yes did you think about Joey!?!
C: We kinda...
M: I was looking for Aspirin
R: During 2 hours???
C: No, after that we had trouble in finding our way...
Ro: What? Even me, I found this place easily!
M: Yes, but...
J: Oh shut up! I don't care!
P: But I've the feeling they are lying...
R: Yes...what could they have done...
J: Oh! I love this game! Maybe they were (smiling in a way sooo ... Joey...;-) you know...) ... having sex!!!
P: Yes that it!!! I feel, your right!
J: He he, me too, romantic contry, candles, wine...
Ro: I don't want to hear more!!!
M: Me neither!
J: C'mon! We're just kidding!
(They leave)
P: (mumbles) I wasn't....(screaming) Heeee! Wait for me!!!

END